I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now.

Knowledge and Ignorance

by Michael Dolan, B.V. Mahāyogi

I think it was Socrates who said “the only thing I’m sure of is that I know nothing,” although he was echoed by Newton over a thousand years later. When Sir Isaac was awarded some recognition for his knowledge, he accepted saying “Well, the difference between us is that you think I know something, where I know I am quite ignorant. That puts me in a better position than you, so I accept the prize.” I’m sure I’ll get lots of corrections from friends who remember it differently. But my point is about knowledge and self-knowledge.

Dylan had a good line: “I was so much older then, I’m younger than that now.” Mark Twain noted, “When I was twenty I thought my father was a complete idiot. When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.”

I was absolutely convinced that I knew everything when I was in my twenties. As I grow older I am convinced that I know very little if anything.

I have friends who assure me that the earth is flat, that the sun goes around the earth, and that we never went to the moon. Others tell me that vaccines are bad for you, that we should all carry fire-arms, that Coca Cola causes cancer but cider vinegar cures it.

As a teacher I have learned from my students that young people always have all the answers and never lie. Meantime, the television assures me that the Mexican Peso will never be devalued that the President’s wife is chaste and that the President himself is an honest man. While surfing the internet I discover that Christian men are destroying their coffee machines to support the election of a child molester in Alabama. Americans paused the mass murder of fellow citizens to celebrate a day of Thanksgiving, honoring the memory of the native peoples who were murdered while we were stealing their land to construct our cities.

My Mexican friends always wonder about Thanksgiving. It’s a holiday they don’t quite understand. If I tell them it’s a day when families get together they wonder why don’t they get together on other days? I explain about the turkey and the big dinner, but no one believes me. Turkey, they feel, is not delicious. Besides it’s a mess to prepare. How could there be such a big deal about eating turkey?

Well, I explain, it’s all about the pilgrims and the Indians. I tell them the story of “Squanto the Indian” and how he helped the first colonists survive the bitter winters of Virginia.

But my Mexican friends are not fooled. They know what happened to the “Indians” and how they were massacred and exiled to Mexico. Many tribes escaped the reservation by going South to the Sonoran desert. Why would the Gringos have a feast day in their honor? Thanksgiving hysteria can’t possibly be based on family, food, or Indians.

I throw up my hands and confess my ignorance. My friends are sad they have put me on the spot and are left scratching their heads. There must be some reason the Gringos go crazy on this day in November, but they can’t get their heads around it.

I must confess at this point that I do not eat turkey or spend the day sitting around a table repeating platitudes about “family” and “giving thanks.” You should know by now from reading this blog that I’m a card-carrying Hare Krishna, and Thanksgiving is not a day on my holy calendar.

Thanksgiving is not a day on the Vaishnava Calendar

I don’t even eat meat, much less turkey. This has provoked any number of discussions and family arguments whenever I have gone home to be with relatives for the holiday season.

But I have learned not to argue with or preach to family members. It only brings grief. As Andrew Carnegie once said, “The man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still.”

And yet, I have found that even amongst the Krishna people there are disagreements. While I try to adhere to a strict vegetarian diet, my friends tell me that sugar is poison, gluten is worse than poison, genetic tomatoes cause mutation, and that Monsanto is the devil. Cookies and macaroni contain eggs, processed cheese has rennet--an animal ingredient, and even bread is based on yeast which is a tiny animal. So one must not eat meat, fish, eggs, macaroni, cookies, coffee or tea, and even milk produces animal cruelty. The poor cows. Fasting is a virtue.

On the other hand, I am told, Veganism is bogus, we are not members of the cow protection society, and that one must eat to keep one’s strength up for preaching. It’s hard to know what to eat anymore.

While I consider myself “well-read,” I am also ignorant of the many conspiracy theories that explain why the world is drifting into a bad place. Apparently NASA scientists in league with the Deep State have brainwashed us into believing that the world is round and that satellites work.

Friends assure me that The New York Times and Harvey Weinstein were responsible for 911 and that professional actors involved in perception management staged the recent massacre in Las Vegas. I’m not sure this stuff really withstands journalistic scrutiny, but I don’t think I can really trust the news anymore.

It’s amazing how ignorant I am. My lack of knowledge is astounding. What a conundrum. I have spent a lifetime reading, studying, and trying to learn. But where once I was convinced I knew absolute everything, now, I’m not so sure.

This predicament reminds me of the words of Bhaktivinod Thakura, the great Bengali saint and teacher. Having spent his life as a high court judge, Bhaktivinod later decided to dedicate everything to the devotional life. In his song cycle Sharanagati, He laments the time he spent in learning and reconciles himself to surrender in divine love:

Bhaktivinod Thakura as High Court judge

1.bidyara bilase katainu kala,
parama sahase ami
tomara carana, na bhojinu kobhu,
ekhona sarana tumi

2. porite porite, bharasa barilo
jnane gati habe mani
se asa bifala, se jnana durbala
se jnana ajnana jani

3. jada-bidya jato, mayara vaibhava,
tomara bhajane badha
moha janamiya, anitya somsare,
jibake karaye gadha

4. sei gadha ho’ye, somsarera ‘bojha,
bhavinu aneka kala
bardhakye ekhona, sakti na abhave,
kichu nahi lage bhalo

5. jibana jatana, hoilo ekhona,
se bidya abidya bhelo
abidyara jwala, ghatilo bisama,
se bidya hoilo selo

6. tomara carana, bina kichu dhana,

somsare na ache ara
bhakativinoda, jada-bidya chari
tuwa pada kare sara

Confidently, I spent my time in the pleasures of mundane learning and never worshiped Your Lotus feet, O Lord. Now You are my only shelter.

Reading on and on, my hopes grew, for I considered material knowledge to be life’s true path. How fruitless was that hope, and how feeble that knowledge proved to be. I know now that all such knowledge is ignorance.

Knowledge of this world is knowledge born of Your illusory energy (maya). It impedes devotional service and makes an ass of the eternal soul by encouraging his infatuation with this temporary world.

Here is one such ass who for so long has carried on his back the burden of material existence. Now in my old age, for want of the power to enjoy, nothing pleases me.

Life has become agony now, my knowledge has proven itself worthless, and ignorance has penetrated my heart with the intolerable, burning pain of a pointed shaft.

O Lord, I seek no other treasure in this world than Your lotus feet. Bhaktivinoda abandons everything to make them the sum and substance of his life.

Bhaktivinod Thakur as devotee dedicated in surrender